Monday, October 12, 2009

A.M.O.P.S. My Idea of Beauty Revisited

So it is still A Month of Positive Solutions (A.M.O.P.S.) but I decided to take a commercial break while I work on the third solution.

Every once and while I like to revisit the idea of how I define beauty amongst the female species. It is often hard to put int words what I find beautiful so I often prefer to give visual examples. I find it necessary to do so now, with the current trend of media that comes out of the west and makes beauty out to be one thing. Since I don't believe in the status quo here is my example of what I find beautiful about women. If you have kept up with my videos you have seen these photos before, but here is a new way of looking at it.


Tr8erGirl said...

beautiful women, all........but was that elaine from seinfeld??

Ehav Ever said...

Hey Tr8erGirl. Thanks. Yes that was Elaine (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) from seinfeld. She is beautiful to me. (smile)

Tr8erGirl said...

i agree! I just wish she would keep her hair curly!! (but i'm biased because my hair is curly!) lol

Ehav Ever said...

Yeah I understand where you are coming from. I also liked it better curly.

Anonymous said...

Nice video. I've seen this theme in a few other blogs. Chris Rock's new movie is bringing more to the discussion, as well.

I'll be honest, I saw Vanessa Williams sing The National Anthem at the Super Bowl one year and decided that I wanted to look like her. I told myself I would get my hair relaxed and get contacts. Mind you, I look like Michelle Obama (or so everyone who stops me on the street tells me).

I grew up in a time where being "redboned" was It and the rest of us were just leftovers. People thought I was adopted when my mother dropped me off at school. She could pass for a white woman, with her red hair and freckles. I struggled with my identity and with the definition of beauty because of that. It didn't help that the first thing out of her mouth to rag on a darker-skinned black person was the fact that they were darker-skinned. She said these things in front of me, and it hurt. It took me awhile to realize that beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.

I've since given up my dream of looking like VW. I like the way I look, and so does my white husband. I still relax my hair, because it's easier to manage, but I don't have Euro-beauty hangups anymore, though, and found some role models in women who looked like me, as a teen. For example, Alek Wek is the most beautiful creature* I've ever seen.

* No racial undertones, in case anyone is offended.

Sorry for writing a blog within a blog. Just felt like adding to the conversation.

Ehav Ever said...

Hey Hawkmom,

Thanks for checking out my blog. No problem with writing a blog within a blog. I do that on a number of people's blogs. I agree that when you come to a place where you find your beautiful because you say so and those who love you say so, THAT alone is enough. In Jewish communities we have a concept of the perfect women being an Eshet Hayil i.e. a woman of valor. The idea that a woman's action accentuates here physical beauty. What she stands for makes her beautiful and the physical is a bonus.

I also went through a phase of being confused by he western concepts of beauty, and at some ponit I realized that I missed out on some really great marriage material women by not having the right vision.

I further believe that people should do all they can to extricate themselves and their children from the western concepts of race and beauty. I don't see it as healthy at all.

Viajera said...

Thanks for posting these beautiful images. I am so glad that you are able to really see the beauty in all the different ethnicities. As HawkMom has expressed, we too often only get one representation. Glad to "meet" a man whose eyes can appreciate it all.
Great post.

Anonymous said...

Ehav --
I am just checking in on all the month of positive solutions postings. Looking forward to completing all of them soon. I plan to show some of them them to my mother while she is visiting. I will both our comments soon.

Ehav Ever said...

Viajera - Thanks for checking out the blog and for your comments. There are a lot of guys out there that recognize beauty in the same way. Sometimes the cultural constructs that we live in prevent us from being able to actualize that reality.

Farababanta - Hey how are you? Tell your mother I said hello. I look forward to your comments.